Funny Technology Conversations

Yesterday, I was traveling back to Pune from Nagpur in a train. The air conditioner wasn’t working much & it was very suffocating – so, I decided to get some fresh air just outside the compartment. I happened to share a small, congested space with a huge fellow passenger near the door. He wasn’t restless or something. We exchanged smiles & made some adjustments to make some space for each other, so we could stand better & still get the air. Standing there, I was just browsing through my phone, checking emails & replying to texts, etc.

Then started the most memorable conversation I have ever had with a stranger & which, I couldn’t wait to post here on my blog. We never got to exchange names nor ask each other about the native town. Why? You will know soon. I’m hoping this to be a good read & should help you during the toughest times to have some laugh.

I couldn’t note down everything immediately on the train but did my best to write down as soon as I reached home.

So here is the conversation

He: Hello sir, how are you? Going to Pune?
Me: I’m good, thanks for asking. Yes – Pune… how about you?

He: I am an engineer working in Pune. I have done Engineering, M.S. and then Microsoft Certification. I want to learn more.
Me: Oh that’s great. Where do you work?

He: I was working with Nagpur Police’s Cyber Crime & now working with Pune Police Cyber Crime dept. I went on a trip for 10 days & I have to join my office on 2nd February. Today is 31st (January) right?
Me: Wow, interesting. Where is your office?

He: Is this your Apple phone? (After a long pause & staring at the phone)
Me: Yes, iPhone 3GS.

He: I have iPhone 4S but, I don’t use it while traveling. I tend to lose my smartphones while in transit. So, I kept it in my bag. I also lost my bag in Rajdhani Express while coming to Nagpur from Delhi.
Me: Ohh, okay! That’s creepy. By the way, where is your office? You didn’t tell me. Is it near Camp area?

He: No… “The Commissioner’s Office”, it’s very close to Pune Station.
Me: Ooh, I see. (Actually, it’s correct both ways. Nearby landmarks)

He: We get 55% discount on Microsoft products. I was one of the last certified engineers receiving a signed certificate by Bill Gates. He then left Microsoft…
Me: uh huh… (Yeah, why wouldn’t he! Right?)

Meanwhile, I was thinking – what’s with the 55% discount? Why  Microsoft could not offer something easy-to-calculate percentile like, 25% or 50%)

He: Microsoft has recently developed a very sleek OS. It will be released in October two-zero-one-two (I assumed he meant, 2012)
Me: Is it really? Which one? (I decided to pretend I knew nothing)

He: The OS is sleek & greatly designed for touch screen iPads!
Me: Wow… Is it really Windows? (Don’t overlook, he mentioned iPad)

He: Yes, It’s Windows 7
Me: But, the Windows 7 is already available. Do you mean, Windows 8?

He: No, It’s Windows 7 SS4
Me: What is Windows 7 SS4? (I began controlling my laughter)

He: Microsoft’s new OS. The OS is sleek & greatly designed for touchscreen iPads.
Me: Okay… I didn’t know… what about Windows 8? Will they even release it? (Again he mentioned Windows for the iPad)

He: No, not so soon. USA “peoples” & companies think, the world is going to end in 2012
Me: Oh, right. I don’t think it will end. What do you think?

geeky-funny-02He: USA companies including Microsoft think, the world is ending & so they’re not ready to develop new BIG software until 2012 is over.
Me: Then, when can we expect Windows 8? (Despite the world’s ending soon!)

He: It will be coming sometime in two-zero-one-three
Me: 2013! That is far away. Why so late? (World is ending but there’s is still some hope)

He: World’s ending in 2012! That’s why, they’ve only developed Windows 7 SS4 till now.
Me: Hmm, okay. I see. (hahaha)

He: What do you do sir? Do you work for any company?
Me: I have a small business in Pune.

(There was a long silence here.)

Me (again): So, working with cybercrime team must be very challenging & tough, isn’t it?
He: I just resigned from my company.

(Holy f*k. Did he not say a few minutes ago that he’s working & joining after holidays)

Me: Why?
He: They didn’t sanction my 8 day vacation, so I told them that – even after working so hard without any chhutti (holiday), you’re still not approving my leave application! Then, I must QUIT… sorry. So, I resigned from that company.

Me: Oh, that’s sad! But, rightly done.
He: Yeah, that’s why – I will be searching for a new job.

Me: Ohh, cool – you should get it easily then, isn’t it? You’re well qualified.
He: Do you have a job? Do you know any company?

Well, damn he caught me there eventually. Of course, I had no job to offer him because of his high qualification (in whatever work I do). I couldn’t resist laughing out loud yet I was feeling pity for him somehow. I excused and left the conversation.

Today, I missed continuing the same discussion. Felt like, I really should have controlled my laughter & conversed more with the guy.

I don’t know, if he was really a Microsoft Certified System Engineer or if he has done M.S. – But, I liked the confidence these people show on any topic.

I felt bad for his parents because I’m sure they spent a lot of money on educating this guy, with high hopes from him (or maybe not & they know what he is!)

I am not posting this just to make fun of the guy, but it’s to show how some conversations can go, even with so-called literates in technology. I also don’t know if he really studied engineering, MS & the MCSE certification or not, I could not verify it. But this level of confidence is bad for anyone. Did you ever come across any such funny & geeky incidence? If yes, then do share with us.